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When it comes to women, their complaints are threefold: 1. When I first sit down with a single woman who is looking for dating advice, I ask her a simple question: "What are you looking for? One of these pitfalls is living together before marriage.

I don't come at this issue from a moral or religious standpoint.

We don’t spend time developing a friendship, which ” And sure, it’ll last a while, but those feelings will always fade (in typically 3–6 months).

When those feelings fade, men and women will jump from relationship to relationship to get that next “emotional high,” never truly understanding what commitment and sacrifice really look like.

You can find volumes on romance, intimacy and passion in marriage — not much on being good friends as husband and wife.

But couples can ignite their love life by boosting the quality of their friendship.

Or maybe couples that have modest rings and receptions feel that their boundless love is a celebration enough.

They need you and your spouse to be great parents and great lovers.The data scientist Randal Olson recently visualized some of the findings from a paper by Andrew Francis and Hugo Mialon, two researchers at Emory University who studied 3,000 married couples in the U. Their findings offer some take-aways for couples who want to minimize their chances of divorce: You should date for three years before popping the question. Similarly, a well-attended ceremony might be a proxy for a large family that pressures and/or supports the couple and helps them stay together.A strong marriage, in other words, is an intentional one.Women typically see it as an almost inevitable step toward marriage, while men see it as a no-obligation "test drive." Couples who initiate a live-in relationship under the fog of such contradictory assumptions are already in trouble. You've heard the old expression, "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?" It's an ugly phrase, but there's some truth to the message.The reason for this is everyone’s looking for the person that’s going to make them happier than anyone else in the world. 1) Clearly, happiness and feelings are crucial, but they aren’t the point.They’re like the icing on the cake, but not the substance that gives it structure.If it’s come up recently between you and your spouse, take heart. Read more Series The parallel between romantic love and God’s relationship with His people is a theme that runs all the way through Scripture, and it has a great deal to teach us about the spiritual dimension of marriage. Of course, if I did get married, I'd figure something out.I see a lot of single women in my office, women who -- despite being smart, successful and attractive -- complain that the dating world isn't being kind to them. If her answer is the latter, we take a critical look at her dating habits. Are her choices leading her to the life that she wants for herself?To be sure, both single women and men must navigate a dating world that often seems long on narcissists and nutjobs, and short on nice and normal. They get stuck in dead-end relationships Of course, men have their complaints too, and these will be addressed in an upcoming blog. Over the past decade or so, I've found there are a few common pitfalls that women who want to get married inadvertently fall into, and which decrease their chances of getting married while they're still young enough to walk down the aisle without stopping for breath.A woman is and should be free to decide what is best for her without being judged, controlled or condescended to by others.My advice is only for those women who want to marry, and is based on studies as well as my professional experience. ”The young couple stares slack-jawed at my friend sitting across the room. We can’t change the date if you think we’re somehow not ready! We love one another and will fight for our marriage and do whatever it takes!They adjust uneasily in their seats and look to one another trying to decipher what type of trick question this is. He leans back and adjusts his horn-rimmed glasses knowing all too well the protests that are about to occur and braces for them.“So let’s say then, after a few weeks, we come to the decision that there are communication issues and red flags that still very much need to be addressed and ask you to wait a while longer until you get married. So that you can grow together a little longer as a couple and have a vibrant and healthy relationship that isn’t plagued by disunity. ”The gears in the young woman’s mind begin to turn quickly. ”The young woman looks pleased with her answer hoping she has convinced my friend. And thus our marriages are plagued by massive communication issues, simply because our dating relationships continue to set us up for failure.




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